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Friday, May 8, 2009

Gone like the wind.

11 Months , gone just like that.


Anger, hurt, disappointment.
Everyone is at fault.

I have not slept. I've been crying since ytd. I wake up to take tissue.
Go toilet. Get all angry.. pray to God for deliverance. Pray to control my temper.
Pray for you, baby.

As we leave this long memory lane, i wanna let u know....
You're still my number 1 boy :)

I'll write down everything i can rmbr, from the start of our journey:}


Met first time @ ljs :)
went sentosa the next day was damn happy when u text me.
when i went sheryl's house u said my mooncake got poison.
Barney.. haha retarded nickname i gave u :X

180608:
dun wanna lend me cardi... ): raining.
wipe away e water for me.
lied on ure shoulder in movie.
ure heart beat hahaha and ure breathing stopped.
met teck ying.. val!
heeren, ^^ 180608.
bought 19qingchun for me!
u were afraid tht i bought it alr.
hugged me on the way back at the traffic light canal.

kissed on day 2. Held my hand and assured me of many things :)

rats.. haha
almost stepped on one and screamed! stunned rat.lol
walked me home.. bubble tea-d arnd yck sec.
We took our first few pics there!
You wore purple and black, didnt know i took picture of us.

u also wore green on one day @ e same place, u said u wanted to see me in my school uni.
i rmbred i actually changed into a new set of uniform lor! :)
Haha, this one now then u know.

we used to curse ure workplace boss for afternoon shifts
and when i used ure phone i would move everything out of place ^^

everytime we took a pic of each other we would say tht there's copyright fees.
Mine wld be $155 -.- cos it was my height!! :)

there was one day i was spemding time with u. but ure friend had some problem.
We cabbed dwn and they told u taiji dont bring ure zb down.
i know u felt bad for leaving me to go off myself, but u had no choice.
i felt bad cos they scolded u ):

One day, i pranked u, haha on msn.
:) you were so cute lah, i rmbred.
i said i love u more den a tub of strawberry ice cream.
Bee, i love u more den anything.

another day, i posted a 'perfect boyfriend thing' i saw on friendster.
You told me " Bee, i wanna be ure perfect boyfriend"
I rmbr it till now, cos it was so sweet ^^

Once, we waited for bus.. i met u very late at night.
we waited and waited..
and we realized there's no last bus!
finish alr! haha, so stupid right! :) But those were the times.

We also fought over my ezlink.
it was sooo ugly but u always bluff me and took it out to see!
haha we would be snatching it while running lah, haha.
"OI BEE!!!!!!!!!! GIMME BACK LA!"

Den we would see all those flying cockroaches and lizards.
Rmbr tht time u said "wont come here one!!"
and it flew to me!!!!! D; RAR!
Den we both jump over the chair!
that was the LAST TIME we ever slacked below tht void deck.

You kope a picture of me doing her meh want meefen anot pose.
ad threathened to post it on ure blog. u wld laugh like shit when u looked at it. :)
and i will be pestering u to del... but cant del!! O;

we went out on 30 june.
took our first few photos in the mrt :)
you were wearing the flesh imp tv shirt?
the one with th tv picture and a volume control right at ure neh neh thr :)
den i always pinch it and to 'turn the volume up' lol!
and after awhile u had blue blacks everywhere. O.O
cos i bit u too............. !
Sorry bee! :x

i used to have this one month rls chain curse thing, but after our one month, we were still in love :)
Haha, it didnt work on us!

You went for the brazil match in july. I could rmbr the excitement in ure voice.
:) and we wld quarrel jokingly over felicia chin and lzx.
haha. bee, i love u more den lzx. forever will :)

Your birthday, i surprised you :)
with ting they all inside.. with choco mint cake!
but the thing is YOU PAID for the bill lmao!!
And we didnt know. lmaooooooooo!!
you were so sweet :}

You sent me to Chris Daughtry's gig :)
i went with jo.
You didnt like it, but you still let me ^^
Before tht we had pastamania @ Bugis. I rmbr, cos the food sign was 18.

I stayed with u in kpool for 2 months
while u wld just play pool and leave me at the seat.

coming occasionally to kiss me. :)
Although i was unhappy and told u in the end, i still did it for 2 months cos i wanted u to be happy.

we had a huge quarrel over lewis, which i probably hurt u alot.
I got hurt to at amk hub... but we did manage to get over it, right? :D

i used to tell u smthg about taking a picture of u in my waistbelt.
BELT BOY? ;D Haha, i don't have a picture of it. Your expression was just so cute. ^^

We ate at Xin Wang Cafe for the first time once. And you had horlicks.
I bet with u i could dissolve all the powder chunks... but i didnt :x
cannot la! and u took retarded pictures of me with the hargao. LOL.

You wld self proclaim ureself as the most handsome guy on earth.
lol! :) And we would joke abt ure posters tear down what not ^^

When i had dance performance in August, u gave me full support ^^

:) On my birthday u brought me out to town to play, i'll always rmbr.
You bought me a tiara, and a necklace! Which u wanted to wear for me but i wore it in the toilet -.-
Thank u bee, your thoughts were so sweet.
You know wht was my birthday wish?
It was quite simple, O lvls results less den 15 and to stay with you happily up to a year, and from there i'll make another birthday wish to stay another year longer.
why all nvr come true ah! Damn must go complain to God. lol.

During tht time i kept getting jealous over amelia & the rachel.
You were jealous over jasper.
We both compromised, not to msg these people.
And it worked :}

remember this? you wrote it for me.
baby this is for you;
Meeting you was fate,
becoming your friend was a choice
but falling in love with you I had no control over.
from 18o6o8 till now, i have never stop loving you.
1 day after another have past, feelings get stronger and stronger.
i love everything about you,
your hugs, your kiss, your voice, your smell,
the way u give the spasms face,
the way you hit me when i tease you,
the way you play with me. i can go on and on and on.
every little things and every moments i treasure.
i don't wanna regret losing you. i wanna treat u better den i've ever treat anyone.
each time we meet, my mind is just like a video recorder.
recording every things that we do. i will remember every single thing we did together.
i'm just afraid that one day, i won't get to see those things again.
afraid that we'll never walk the same road together side-by-side anymore.
i wish for u to be my girl always. i wanna hold you tight,
until ur heart is able to feel my heartbeat. never leave me baby.
i hope you have already placed everything into this relationship, cos i already did.
and i promise , you will never regret putting all that you have into it.
place ur hand in mine, hold it tight, let's walk this road together. never let it go.
oh yes bee, i swear the past is all behind me.
I LOVE YOU; TAN MING SHUANG
iheartsyou! :D
`18o6o8
`TOH JIA HUI ALVIN & TAN MING SHUANG

@YES CAFE. Okay u wna know why i kept laughing :)
Cos i saw ure leg kept seducing ure xiao jiu leg. tht's all.
But at tht time it was really funny lah!! ^^ hahaha. k now u know.
I used to say break den i tell u... didnt know there'll be this time.

You used to go to mlysia to visit ure dad's side cousins. And i guess...
i always missed u alot. Haha, i wld either be doodling ure name on my ten year series or texting you ^^ haha. Now everyday is going to feel like the days u went to malaysia ):

I used to laugh at you when i center part ure hair :) when i bought my tear lens i kept asking you " IS IT SHINY IS IT SHINY" Haha, you always answered me with what i wanted to hear.

You would hug me super tightly till i laughed cos i felt it was very funny. You would arrange my hair, smell my hair, kiss my hair. hahaha! i even made u tie my hair which u totally failed okay! :) You would shock me @ void decks with hugs from behind! ^^ Tho it is really very shocking and i dun wan it anymore, but i really liked it. So loving. :)

Once, i almost fainted, cos i totally didnt eat fo 2 days cos we had this huge breakup.
You came to look for me and called ivan dwn to give me water. u told .... to get me strawberries and not tell me :) So sweet hor.

We loved to eat xiao long baos @ Ding tai fung.
and we would follow the instructions given at the back of the chopsticks.
:) Haha, we would bluff each other we ate more so the rest is 'yours'. But actually we just wanted each other to have it :)

I used to laugh @ you cos you were super scared of prawns.
Live prawns. And ure hand wld itch when u handled them ):

You privated ure blog for me, so random girl taggers wont tag. :)
And i wont be jealous. I loved ure thoughtfulness! ^^ And, i wld secretly blog for u to give u surprises :} You celebrated My friend's bdae with me, crabbie? and i went to shermaine's bbq where we toasted the honey butter bread tgthr :)

We even went to the very cute icecream place w shermaine & cm, played snakes and ladders. rmbr? And before tht prata. And i would hear all sorts of sec school nonsense from u all ^^
You would alway put ure hand on my lap to ensure me tht im not left out. It was so sweet.
I feel like leaning on ure shoulder now ):

You motivated me for my o lvls, accompanied me to study!
And u studied ure driving test while i did chem.
u still failed ure driving test.

When u got ure police enlistment, we were so happy! we made plans on what to do after ure pop, u cut bangs, come amk npc, after 5pm find me, drive me to schl in 3rd yr of poly.. and i would tell this to everyone in my class! And all would squint in envy. :}
We were so lovinggggg :)

We even pulled thru the part where ure mom hated me like mad.
tht day, they all misunderstood. I went to chck on u to see if ure home cos we broke up.
In the end you held my waist :) -my heart melted lor. ^^ and u asked if i wanted to drink.
I missed u so much .. i said yes.
Your mother thought i taught u to stay out late D;
I left.... after a few days, we were back again, hugging and laughing @ each other. ^^

5th month:

baby;
i miss you.
5months with you is great. many things we've gone thru tgt.
even tho many a times we quarrel.
remember, that i've always loved you.
but im sure we have many happy moments too! (:
i know what i should do already.
it's a secret! *shhhhh*
to make you the happiest girl in the world. (:
ure impossible to find, honey.
now that i got you, dun wanna lose you.
i know ure the one for me. certainly.
~18o6o8~

Reading this again brings back memories. :) Sweet and bitter, but at tht time, we were together hand in hand.

We took pictures @ Xinwang. we pouted like small kids! haha!
And we bought the yellow couple tee @ kovan!
and took pictures @ crabbie's house also. :)
Made them into the 6 months board where i spent alot of effort! :)

You gave me this globe, precious moments.
I know how much it is lor, dun have to bluff :) It's close to $60.
On it, it wrote "I'll never let you down"
Literally never let me down, the statue was a boy piggy-backing a girl :)
A rose, hand drawn, a letter u wrote, i almost teared.
I was so touched. You're so sweeeeeeeeeeet , love.

20th december- you met my mom @ singtel.
haha, rmbr how we tried to finish the subway sandwich! Omg so cute la!
Haha, cos we were too full. went from kovan to amk and u finally met her. LOL!
To think now you and her are so close alr.. but we've just parted.

we went to ure sec school mates chalet. we slept everywhr!
Beach, under the rain @ e poolside, and finally one day on the bed, 4 people together, LOL! But i still enjoyed my stay cos i was with u. Quarreled again on the last night or smthg, and we got over it. Im sorry for whatever happened tht time. :) *hugs*

Accompanied me to dance @ the church, u were always supportive of me dancing! :)
Until tpde. Lol. Anyw, you would carry my bag for me, massage me :)
And recently when my thigh hurts u'll still massge for me.
And i'll complain it's ticklish and tickle u back and u'll go "Whaaat!! Im massagginggg!!!!"
:) Haha, we were so sweet. I would massage ure shoulders and when i had headaches u would ease them. :) I rmbr all.

When my leg hurt, you carried me up th overhead bridge.
When i felt tired u piggy backed me.
When i was tired and began acting like a drunkard, you tolerated.
I rmbr, cat drinking my peach tea.

I went to church with you, candlelight services :)
We held candles and watched the whole church light up.
Speaking of candles, we walked around town and got 2 big candles, which are still with me.
:D Haha, anyway. did u use the foam we got! hahah! and colgate! ^^

I went cell groups and we played the do you know her/him well game :x
and we got the singers wrong. I got them wrong. I thought is angela cos u always say u like her.
And haha, mine remains as luo zhi xiang lah. :) But i love you more. He lose alot ^^

And you brought me to eat buffets at parkroyal :}
Days there were like husband and wife, you take food for me and we accompany each other.
Buy grapes! And I ate so much sashimi. :x

on 13th november,you accompanied me to gotham.
I haven't clubbed for a few months, so you went with me :}
We took pictures, had fun. I covered ure eyes when the model walked on the stage and upskirt :) aFTER THAT, we went to eat chilli crab cup noodles :) and slacked next to the river. You watched me sleep on ure lap, even when u are so so so tired. :) Ily bee.

Everytime on walls, pilars when there are pictures like hot babes in bikini i would point and go "SEE BEE!" and after u saw, i will smack u and say "walao u good lor see other girl" haha :} Eh, u did it to me also k! CK Underwear model. lol!!!! not purposely rmbr de HAHAHAHA!

One day when i had morning exams and finished early, you bluff me u were still slping and u surprised me at macs!! Rmbr! Yishun Macs. I screamed so loud u were so ps, hahahahah. sorry lah beeee :(

You brought me out to places like Ichiban sushi to eat, alot more lah!
They were all super ex, but u didn't mind as long as i was happy.
Every single cent u spent on me u felt it was worth.
Now you don't think so right......... hmmmm T.T

We would go to the open rooftop of my block and watch the sunset :) Enjoy the breeze, with you hugging me. I am very scared of heights, but with you, i felt safe. I know you won't let me fall. :)

Went with me for C'mas party @ crabbie house.
Actually we only planed to pass the charger,but in the end she let us in^^
We were seen as one.

Rmbr when we went shopping in ntuc! You pushed me around in the trolley :)
We bought prawns to cook! and alot more.
I helped u out in the kitchen. :) We had little fights.
You maid said we were ROMANTIS... HAHAHHA

Rmbr kp kia from chalet? hahah i just rmbred :)

And we spent $70 on arcade to catch sweets to get the jackpot!
a $19.90 poor bear . :) But we were so satisfied. :} You forked out so much, to make me happy.
ily baby <3

We brought jolene and ming jie to play arcade, rmbr!! :) Like mommies and daddies.
and we would go to the counter just to hug :} And bluff them we changing coins. ^^

Sometimes i would send u to bugis mrt for work(ure shatec attachment)!:) And we would delayy delayyyyyyyy cos we cldnt bear to part.... cus i know i'll miss you... and i'm missing you.

You went with me to look for handphones.... blaaa, even when it wasted ure time.
You watched twilight with me when u didnt want to and yes it sucked but as long as i wanted to watch it, you would pei me. i know u dun wanna watch winx club, but u suggested cos u knew that i wanted to :)

You showered me with gifts... clothes, slippers, shoes... sweets.. everything! even my poly notebooks and colour pens. cos u said, i can study better when my studying materials are nice :)

Like u said on the phone, last time i wld por u and apologise. Well, i like it when u por me too when im angry.. pretending to be angry.. :) you'll go like" i tell u ah!! u better dun like this hor i tell u! dun make me tickle u !" :} haha, oh man. i miss those times. :(

Valentine's was a girl's dream. went to eat crab and lobster! No matter the price, you wld bring me there as long as i liked it.As long as WE were happy, u were happy. I wld be too! Took neos... :) we were so... blissful i thought.. it would never end.

Neoprints with my friends... everything... i've done so much with u.
Newyear, u came... helped my mum..
sushi with my mum before army.
letters... army..
Gifts..... snacks i bought for u...
durian, even when i hated the smell....
edited your blogskin... hours!.... melvin's chalet...
cycling...

my dream picnic.... never to come.
.
.
.
i'm tired and i've to head to school.
i know this time it's for real. So after i post this....
it'll remain as a memory.
I love you.









180608.

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